


San in Wonderland

by Rocklobsters0304



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Attempt at Humor, Dark, Dreams, Dreams vs. Reality, Fluff, Hallucinations, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Insomnia, Inspired by Alice in Wonderland, Mentions of addiction, Mentions of alcohol, Mystery, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, References to Illusion mv, References to Inception mv, Semi-Graphic Description of Injury, Slow Burn, Violence, Wonderland mv inspired, Woosan, Yusan, but very little of that, but yet again it’s very little of that, hongsan, just in case, mentions of drug usage, plot heavy, seongsan - Freeform, trigger warning, yungi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-12 19:34:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29764536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rocklobsters0304/pseuds/Rocklobsters0304
Summary: Sometimes when big things are about to happen in your life, fate tries to prepare you for the future.For San that came in the form of dreams. And a certain Kim Hongjoong.
Relationships: Choi San & Kim Hongjoong
Kudos: 2





	San in Wonderland

**Author's Note:**

> Whaaa I’m (kind of?) back!
> 
> I’ve been working on this story since the beginning of December and I’ve probably re-written this story maybe more than three times already until I was finally starting to get satisfied with the end result… World building is a Beach and, still, I like doing it…  
> Because of that, this story is getting quite big and I’m trying to get some details and developments just right, which is quite hard and I’m still busy reconstructing some parts, but since I’m halfway there I like to post this teaser prologue. Especially since Ateez' comeback is in a few hours already! (Whaaa I’m so excited!!!)
> 
> Some information about the story:  
> I intended this to have a similar vibe as my other Ateez fanfic, but it became definitely less emotionally heavy (in my opinion) and more leaning towards a darker concept. This story also has a bigger, more thought through build up, filled with more suspense, and lots of details, so be ready for a lot of mystery solving and explaining throughout the chapters.
> 
> As the story continues I will add some tags not to spoil everything from the beginning. 
> 
> Some update information:  
> I really planned to have this story finished by the beginning of March, but I'm trying to get into conservatory and audition season is about to start once more T^T so finishing my demo’s is my priority right now.  
> I do hope to have everything finished before the beginning of April. I can't promise an exact date when I will update the actual story, but you don't have to worry about me not posting it at all (I've already spend so many hours on this... (╥﹏╥))
> 
> Anyways, as always, English is not my first language, so there could be some spelling and/or grammar errors (especially since it’s not beta read, even though I do multiple proofreads myself). 
> 
> I hope you’ll enjoy the prologue (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:·ﾟ✧

“Fuck… ugh…”

…

Do you know that feeling of being hit by a truck after waking up from a night drinking yourself completely wasted? That pounding headache and miserable feeling you need to barf at the slightest movement you make? Yeah… San definitely regretted drinking so much last night… 

But was it worth it? 

Most definitely. 

San smiled a half assed satisfied grin through the feeling of his shitty hangover, when he remembered Wooyoung had yelled that every drink was on him. Maybe he’d drank too much, but at least he didn’t have to pay for it all. Especially since Wooyoung, when drunk himself, was always the one to get one or two drinks for free if he whined just long enough. 

But yesterday was special and Wooyoung made sure San would feel special. It was a special day, right? San vaguely remembered an euphoric feeling of relief that had finally relaxed some of his tensed muscles after a long time. But whether that was due to his alcohol intake or entirely something else, remained unexplained for now. 

What he did know for sure however, was that his doctor definitely would have deemed their celebration method questionable and he probably would have scolded him for his reckless drinking behavior last night. But it was just one night, right? After countless days and nights of being sober, one night wouldn’t kill him, right? 

Besides, his friends were there with him. 

He wasn’t alone. 

Which immediately made it a little less irresponsible, right?

“Gnn,” San groaned when the throbbing pain in his head made itself more present. He was clearly waking up even though he didn’t want to let go of the good feeling sleep brought upon him. He wanted to snuggle some more in his pillow and disappear underneath his blanket. He wanted to drown in the warmth of his bed, only to realize the  _ lack _ of. 

San frowned when he finally noticed his unnatural sleeping position and the hard surface his arms and head had been resting on. He felt how his legs were dangling above the ground, since he was seated on a quite uncomfortable bar stool.

“Uh?” 

When the confusion settled in, San opened his eyes and tried to sit upright, his backbone popping in the process and he groaned some more when the muscles over there started to protest as well. For how long had he been in that position? For how long had he been sleeping?

But maybe a more important question: where was he? He still remembered they’d been to a bar last night, but how it had ended was a little more vague to him. Still, Yunho wouldn’t just leave him at the bar, right? They were roommates! And Wooyoung definitely would have dropped him off at home without Seonghwa nagging him about it. Or they would have just taken him to their apartment instead.

However when his sight fully focussed, he took note of a wall which held a variety of bottles of different sizes and different colors, which, in their turn, held liquids in various colors. 

Was he still at the bar? 

No, that couldn’t be. First and foremost, his friends wouldn’t leave him alone, and second, the owner of the bar would have woken him up when closing time came around, right? Although he had to admit that it was suspiciously quiet inside the bar.

He looked down to confirm that the surface he had been lying on was indeed the mahogany counter of a bar, only to startle when something moved in front of his face. Or rather, unfold itself. 

Crossed eyed, San stared at the beautifully decorated wings of a blue butterfly that sat on the tip of his nose. 

San chuckled a little, completely forgetting about his whereabouts for a moment, when the insect didn’t seem to move, “Hey, hello there buddy, what are you doing over there?”

The butterfly flapped his wings slowly in response. 

He watched how its wings glowed in the dull lighting above them. What was this beautiful butterfly doing in a bar? In fact, why was it still alive mid winter? 

It was halfway through January and temperatures had dropped below freezing point. San even remembered his, although childish, snowball fight with Yunho that afternoon. A smirk made its way on San’s face when he thought back at how swiftly he had hit his tall target, only for it to turn into an expression of slight embarrassment when he remembered how he had slipped and fallen in the snow right after. 

“Really what are you doing here?” San asked the butterfly on a more serious note this time, before it finally startled from the airflow that came from his mouth. 

The small creature flew off, fluttering past the many bottles in front of him until it stopped on a prominent plume of purple lavender. San couldn’t smell the sweet yet calming scent from where he sat, but he did remember the smell.

It was then that San noted the many plumes that peaked through the bottles like weed growing in your garden. 

That was odd…

San started to think that he wasn’t at the bar from yesterday night. No, that he was  _ sure _ of right now. But when did he end up here? Where were his friends? 

“Where am I?” San whispered in awe of what the decorated wall looked like. 

“Good question.”

Ungracefully San jerked his head to look behind him, right into the eyes of another boy. Was he the owner of this bar? He did look rather young if that were the case. 

“Who are you?” San asked when he viewed the other guy properly. He had black, curved hair that parted in the middle and a fringe that covered most of his forehead up to his eyebrows. He had big, brown eyes, high, prominent cheekbones, a button nose and pouty lips and San couldn’t help but find him really cute.

“That too is a good question,” the boy answered, “but I suppose I am you.”

Now  _ that _ comment definitely ruined San’s slightly uplifted mood and he pouted at the confusing response, “Thanks for the clarification… but can I at least put a name to your face?”

“You can call me Choi Jongho,” the boy responded a little bit indifferently. 

“Thank you,” San said in a softer, less sarcastic sounding voice, but he was still confused, “Are you the owner of this bar? It looks…” 

San didn’t finish that last sentence when he tried to search for the right description. He looked at the rest of the bar in a loss of words. To his surprise the wooden interior seemed vegetated, in some other spots there seemed to be growing moss, yet the mahogany didn’t seem  _ that _ damaged. And while most of it fell through cracks and holes in the floor,  _ sand _ seemed to fall from the ceiling.

But, even though the bar didn’t seem well looked after, San thought it held something magical and in some way it explained why the butterfly had been in there. It did however make him question once more where all of this came from in the middle of the winter. Or even at all, while he was at it...

“No,” Jongho answered his long forgotten question, “I’m merely keeping watch.”

“For who?” 

“For you,” he clarified. 

“For me?” San raised an eyebrow at the boy, “Why?”

“Well, somebody has to,” Jongho shrugged, “And you clearly can’t do so yourself.”

What?

San huffed offended at that statement, “I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself!” Just not when he was drunk… But aside from his present hangover, he was perfectly sober right now. Still, he sounded a little less confident when he asked his next question, “Do you know where my friends are?” 

“Outside.”

Okay, good.

“So~, where can I leave?” San asked as he hopped from his chair, searching for the exit. 

“Isn’t this where you wanted to be all this time?” Jongho asked in return. 

“No, I just want to go right now,” San said, more resolute. 

San became a little bit suspicious of the boy. If he wasn’t this bar’s owner, then who did he think he was trying to convince San to stay in some else’s place? Did he want to feed him some more alcohol? Kidnap him and hold him hostage for money? Not like he was worth so much… Nah… that couldn’t be it, but this boy did have something strange going on… 

“Leaving is gonna take a while, though,” Jongho shrugged and San rolled his eyes at the indirect answer to his question. He has really had enough of this cryptic conversation which created an uneasy feeling in his stomach, so… searching for the door himself it was. 

San turned his back to Jongho and muttered underneath his breath, “Why are you making less sense after each answer you give?” But of course fate wanted for the other boy to hear his complaint… 

“Why aren’t you asking me more  _ specific _ questions then?” Jongho smirked in return, before he grabbed for something that suspiciously looked like a joint from the table he sat at and lit it. 

San lifted an eyebrow when he had turned to the boy to see the scene unfold, “Aren’t you a little too young to be smoking?” 

“A few questions ago you thought I was old enough to be the owner of this place,” Jongho shrugged before he played with the joint in his hands. Even though he didn’t puff, smoke rose up to the ceiling. Pastel pink, baby blue, lime green, the room became hazy before San’s eyes, as if the smoke had been blown into them.

Ignoring the mist, San rolled his eyes at Jongho’s witty answer as he gave up on a normal conversation. This guy clearly wasn’t taking the hint of a hungover man in need for straight answers. Yeah, maybe he was too young to understand that San, in his current state, really just wanted to go home… 

Right… the exit.

Sadly when he looked around the slightly hazy bar he found a significant lack of one. There was no door and there were no windows. It almost seemed like a closed room and San started to question his reality at that point in time. 

Almost.

Because San found one when he searched near the walls. Right behind a useless, decorative, black curtain, he found a door. A really  _ small _ wooden door, which a toddler even wouldn’t properly fit through if they tried. 

He couldn’t possibly have entered through  _ that _ , right? But if that were the case, he did understand why it would take him a long time to leave… 

Seriously…? 

Exactly how drunk had he been last night…?

San huffed at the impossible when he tried to open the door, but it was locked. He rummaged with the door handle for a while, ignoring the fact that it had a very present keyhole, before he turned himself to Jongho once more with his hand held out.

“Do you have the key?” San asked, before he specified himself, “For this door.”

“I do,” Jongho simply said.

“Well, can I have it?” San asked, a little more impatient. 

“Do you promise me to come back?” Jongho then asked in return and the shivers ran down San’s spine when he sensed an unfamiliar form of concern radiating from the boy. 

He was concerned for San. 

But why?

Yes, San was very aware of the fact that he had drunk a little too much last night. Yes, he was a little bit hungover. And yes, he was alone right now with no clue as to where his friends were or even where he himself was. But why would this stranger give off this strong feeling of concern, when he didn’t know him?

Still San answered.

“I promise.” 

It was a lie.

But what else would you have answered when you really want to go home?

At that Jongho looked at San once more, concern written all over his face when he eyed him from head to toe. From his messy black hair to the black circles surrounding his eyes, down his lean body and it made San feel very self conscious, yet he kept himself still all the while, until Jongho turned himself to the table, where he placed his unused joint, to reach for a golden key, which he then threw at San. 

“Thanks,” San mumbled when he clumsily caught the key. 

Without looking back at the guy, he turned himself to the door once more and walked over. The weird part however was, when he moved closer, the door seemed to grow, almost like a visual trick, until it was the right size for him to fit through. But San had stopped caring about these weird occurrences by now, blaming his hangover and lack of sleep. 

Maybe the alcohol hadn’t been completely out of his system? Even though he knew too well that alcohol didn’t have these hallucinating effects.

And when he opened the door he saw nothing but a poorly lit staircase instead of the outside world. Neither could he see where the staircase ended other than that it led downwards, since darkness seemed to have the upper hand over there. 

He quivered a little, but he didn’t think of it more than it just being another normal staircase before he set his first step. He just hoped that this wasn’t going to take long, since he desperately longed for a familiar face and a warm comforting embrace from his friends.

Then the door behind him closed.

_ “Welcome to Wonderland, San.” _

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much if you’ve considered reading this story and making it through the Prologue. I hope I’ve captured your interest for the rest of the story, sooo~ until the first real update!
> 
> P.S. Let's enjoy Ateez' Comeback in a few hours ☆ヾ(*´・∀・)ﾉヾ(・∀・`*)ﾉ☆


End file.
